You know how much you love all your children and the special love you have for your autistic child. He cannot tell you why he is throwing a tantrum or why he is upset.
Here are some of the things your autistic child might want to tell you, if only he had the words. Kids are so different. Your child might tell you something else.
“I want to have fun”
Hey, I am a kid. I don’t want to go to therapy. I want to roll on the floor instead. I want to drop things and break them. I want to unwrap all the bars of soap you bought on sale and throw them down the toilet and flush.
I like to see things go “down the hole.” Why aren’t you excited about that? I love to spin your saucers.
The one with the chip is the best one and you keep throwing it in the garbage. Why do you keep showing me how to roll my car on the floor? I want to see how fast the wheels can spin. Isn’t that why cars have wheels?
“My senses are all messed up”
Raindrops on the roof sound like thunder. A whisper hurts my ears but loud cartoons don’t bother me. I laugh hysterically when people argue. It is so exciting to me.
I love the smell of skunk but hate your perfume. I love loud head banging music and I even bang mine because it feels good.
You were furious with me when I drank the bottle of ketchup. I only got a little bit on the floor. You really freaked out when I drank the whole bottle of barbecue sauce. I never stopped to think that maybe you wanted to drink it yourself.
“I do not think in abstract terms”
Never ask me silly questions like do I have ants in my pants? I will check this alarming development no matter who is watching. I remember the ants from last summer.
Don’t ask me what love is. Don’t ask me what I want to be in the future. There is only now for me. Stop confusing me.
“My thoughts are not your thoughts”
Maybe you are in a hurry but I’m not. I don’t want to go there but I like the other direction. You are not caring so I guess I’ll flop.
You want to shop in the mall but I want to go look at magazines, so I’ll just take off and do what I want. Anyway, it is exciting when the mall cops find me and they yell at you, mom.
“I love to say things that sound interesting to me”
I love that TV ad. I could say it all day long. I want to say “PG 13” over and over. It is just so soothing to do that. I love bad words.
When I say them, people react and they get all flustered and yell a lot. I like it so I’ll keep saying them even though I don’t know what they mean.
It is a daily adventure trying to figure out that precious child of yours. All anyone can do is watch, observe, and learn how to best cope with his unique problems and perceptions and doing it with love.