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Saturday, February 22, 2020

Why You Should Talk to Your Friends About Your Sex Life


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Emmanuella Ekokotu
Ekokotu Emmanuella is a sociologist and Anthropologist, writer, and fashion model who lives in Benin city, Edo state,Nigeria.

Sex issues are meant to be discussed only between people in a relationship or people who have sex with each other. Most of the time, people get angry when their partner goes out talking to their friends about their personal issues, or even discuss their sex life outside.


I’m sure there are pros and cons to discussing your sex life with other people most of the time it could lead to the downfall of your relationship and some other times it could be beneficial to your link it all depends on the kind of people you’re talking to and what exactly you are talking about now let us take a look at the cons first before we talk about the reasons why you should discuss your sex life with your friends.

Cons of talking about your sex life with friends

For us ladies, whenever it comes to issues of sex, we always want to feel like we’re having the best of it. You want your friends to know how good your man is in bed or what badass thing he did recently. well this my just really excited you trying to share your experience this innocent chick chat might get some people jealous, and that kind of jealousy often leads to unexpected behaviour from a few friends.

Someone might decide to take up the challenge to steal this so-called man who’s good in bed just to teach you a lesson, and some other persons may hate you secretly because they feel like you are just a showoff.

One basic rule about discussing your relationship or sex life with people is never to talk about such things with fellows who are not in a relationship as serious as yours. Moreso, avoid discussing it with those who you know do not have a healthy sex life as this might come off as you trying to make them feel bad about themselves and how their lives have turned out.

Some of your friends might get judgy if you tell them about certain things you do in the bedroom ( especially if they tend to act more morally upright than a priest).

Something else to keep in mind is how your partner would feel if they find out you have been discussing your relationship or your sex life with other people. It depends on how good your sex life has been; your significant other might feel like the rest of the world is reviewing his insecurities.

However, if you trust the people, you confide in, and you think that your partner will be comfortable with you discussing your private life with them then, by all means, go ahead. I would give you some tips on the reasons why it will be nice for you to discuss your sex life with your friends.

1. Chatting with your girls about your sex life can be lots of fun, but not only can make you guys crack a few laughs it could also create an emotional support system for you when you’re having issues with your bedroom life.

2. your girls could give you valuable pointers when you’re looking to spice up your sex life. You probably are not reaching orgasm with the methods you are familiar with, or you are just not feeling the sex no matter how hard you try. The girls chat is always a way to find out new sex positions you’ve never heard of, or you’ve never tried. Your best friend might have to be in your area and would be glad to give you advice based on how she was able to manage her situation. Other ladies will be willing to provide you with a hint or two to help you motivate your spouse to give you the mind-blowing sex that you desire.


According to a Maine-based sex therapist who goes by the name Jennifer Wiessner in a talk with Health about a women’s retreat, she said “After one woman tearily disclosed her longing for an improved sexual connection with her partner, the group opened up, and the questions flowed, as did the guidance between participants.

Participants were able to notice their connectedness in their feelings and offer each other understanding and support.” Jennifer concluded by emphasising that on the fact that talks like this help women to realise their sexuality and accept it for what it is and also find ways to better themselves sexually.

3. Discussing your sex life with your girls could help you and them bond better. This is because primarily for women, when the issue of sex is introduced into friendship, everyone is considered as being vulnerably honest, and that has become the core of many female friendships that last long.

Your girls will be able to trust you more because you can let out details about such a personal topic, and they also will be free to share their experiences with you. Asides the part where you get to bond, there is an also listening ear for you whenever you need it, and that is a valuable gift. Even when there is an issue that bothers you (maybe you cheated, or there is a secret that has been bothering you, and you are too afraid to share it with your spouse), Your friends are the best people to open up to.

4. Talking about your sex life with friends could help you work through more significant issues. Jennifer says “On a practical note, talking with friends about sex can reduce anxiety and fears about one’s body, how it functions, and its unique differences.” Adding that she has had to deal with females who feel abnormal because of their inability to have an orgasm “After just 30 minutes of education in my office about the clitoris, stimulation, and responsive desire, they walk out feeling empowered.”

5. You will eventually find out you do not have the worst sex after all. A lot of people make you believe their sex lives are the best when you hear them talk about it, but when you’re able to get honest with your girls, you begin to find out that they all have their sexual problems and your sex life may not be that bad after all. If you continue to believe the things you see on social media or TV, you will end up being depressed. So what are you waiting for? Go chat with your ladies.

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