If you begin to notice unusual behavioural patterns in your relationship, you wouldn’t want to quickly assume it as a sign that your partner is considering leaving. No relationship is easy; we all have to put in the effort to make it work. So if you notice your partner’s attitude has changed, and they don’t seem their usual loving self, then it means you need to have a talk.
This is to let you know what’s really happening, but the only way to know is by asking. There are tons of reasons why a person might be tired of being in a relationship, but you might not know what the actual cause(s) are until you ask. Opening a healthy line of communication is vital.
This helps to build up a definite connection between you two, and it also reduces and controls tension that might likely build. Nancy Ruth Deen, a relationship expert, thinks that “You’ll want to schedule a time to talk, where you don’t feel rushed, and there is an opportunity for both of you to talk. “If your suspicions are correct and there is really something troubling your relationship, however, you both decide to work on it, don’t expect things to get better immediately.
It would take time before the connection kicks off like it used to. It’s usually a slow pace, slow and steady pace in rebuilding your relationship back up. Communication has to be continuously established. This helps you to understand what went wrong and how you can fix things.
You both can take it from there and know the right steps to take in solving any issues. Let us discuss some of the signs that indicate your partner might want to leave the relationship, as well as ways to approach the issue with a positive effect.
1. They don’t want to bother arguing
It’s likely that the reason why your partner would prefer to stay calm and quiet instead of arguing with you is because they are tired of the relationship. Arguing within a reasonable level is a healthy sign of expressing deep and different opinions, this helps to reach a compromise. This is possibly happening because there are unresolved issues in your relationship and the silence might be a sign that your partner is seeking a breakup.
This is why it is critical to talk about it immediately if you want it saved from the brink.Therapy is also another way of dealing with the issue of using professional skills. Madison said, “It also allows both partners to heal from past hurts caused by each other or their childhood, that are still affecting them in their adult life.”
2. They do not prioritise the relationship
Yes, life demands so much from us, and this causes us to get busy and even carried away that we hardly find the space to spend quality time with our partners. Madison says, “if you feel as if your partner no longer prioritises your needs, that may be a sign that they are not caring about the relationship. “You may decide to give your partner some space because you feel that’s what they need.
They probably even told you so in other different ways. This could be helpful as it gives your partner time to reflect on the relationship. Madison advised, “Take some time away as a couple,” remember how you two began dating, what drew you to each other, the dreams you two want to accomplish together, and what you love about each other.”
3. When they are distant
According to Madison, “Humans often crave connection and intimacy, which is why your partner’s lack of desire to cuddle, kiss, have sex, etc., may be a sign they’re thinking about leaving. If there is no current issue that may have caused such physical distance, then your fears are probably true.
Such things can cause a change in sex life for the negative, and this can hinder deeper connections between you and your partner. Speak up immediately you noticed a lack of intimacy. Asking questions and expressing your concern may help resolve underlying issues, anger and resentment.
4. When they get cranky easily
It is easy for little things to tick people up when they need a reason to get upset. They could express anger over anything and everything if possible. If you notice your partner is reacting this way towards you, then something is definitely wrong. Agreed, people get cranky and they are allowed to; so don’t be so quick to read meanings into your partner’s irritable mood or immediately assume the worst in your relationship.
This means you need to take a closer look and study their mood when they get ticked off. You could ask why they are the way they are. What is wrong? Taking this step helps you to tackle the main issue but don’t be too invasive in your inquisition. Remain calm so the matter doesn’t result to something beyond your control.
5. Night crawling
Working late sometimes may let you get home late. You could easily get carried away while hanging out with friends and this is considered normal. However, if your partner has made a habit of coming home at odd hours without any genuine reasons, then it is obvious they are hiding from something or someone. You should be worried if they start making plans without letting you know about it.
Dr Racine Henry, PhD, LMFT, suggest “You should ask about the people in their lives and comment on how long it’s been since you’ve seen their mom or best friend. “Inquire about why your partner is creating a barrier in your relationship.
“People react differently to different situations and there’s always a reason why people do what they do. Your partner won’t immediately tell you what’s wrong till you ask. If they are willing to talk, then you should have the opportunity to tackle the issue as soon as possible.
6. When they cancel or change plans
Dr. Henry makes us to understand that “If your spouse is no longer being intentional about making sure you spend quality time together and is changing the routine about your alone time, they could be thinking of leaving.
This may include cancellation of plans to see the movies, date nights or changing last minute plans. You have to voice your concerns as soon as you can and make your partner understand they would have to make the next plan work. If they show no interest or aren’t interested, then this is an indication that they aren’t interested.
7. When they suddenly want separate finances
Margaret Williamson tells us that, “There is nothing wrong with having separate bank accounts, but if your partner suddenly wants to cut down or eliminate shared expenses, it could be a sign they are planning a life that doesn’t include you… or your money.” Take note when and if your partner acts differently in regards to how you both share your finances. You should ask them why they want to these changes, and they decide not to include you in their financial plans if that was the case before.
8. They avoid talks about the future
A subtle indication that your partner isn’t on the same page with you is when they try to avoid conversations directed at the future. They could avoid talking about the next Valentine’s Day, Christmas holidays spent with other family members or even the next Easter break.
You can’t miss the signs, bring up another future event that would typically involve the both of you. If they show no interest, then you should start talking. Ask why they’ve become evasive with matters that should be handled with utmost seriousness. Do well to resolve underlying issues immediately.
9. When they easily pick fights
Just as becoming too quiet isn’t good, getting uncontrollably upset or even physical is considered worst.Justin Lavelle who is a dating expert says, “When we are frustrated, we tend to lash out quickly and sometimes for no good reason.” Your partner is probably upset about something, and it’s best if you try sitting them down and talk it out.
The earlier it is you settle it, the better. Allow them to tell you what the major problem is and find ways to iron things out.Does your partner show any of the signs above? How do you resolve conflicts? Share with us in the comments. Thank you.