There are many reasons to pay special attention to your sex life. Not only is it a fun way to connect with your man, but studies show that marital satisfaction was significantly associated with sexual satisfaction. So the happier you are in bed, the happier you are in your marriage.
Just remember that satisfying your man doesn’t have to be outrageous or degrading. There are many simple things you can do that are sure to amp up your sex life.
Want to help him live out his greatest desires? Here are 7 effective tips from a credible marriage course for giving your husband the sex life he has always fantasized about.
1. Be Confident
Men love a confident woman in bed – it is a major turn on for them. Take charge in the bedroom and don’t be afraid of whatever happens. This is your husband and he loves you.
Even if you feel like you’re embarrassing yourself by trying a new position, wearing a sexy outfit, role playing, or (gasp) doing it with the lights on – odds are he is absolutely loving your confidant play.
Interestingly, a study about the role that sexual and emotional intimacy play in relationship satisfaction showed that, while women are not affected by their husband’s satisfaction in the bedroom, “husbands tended to report high levels of relationship satisfaction when their wives reported greater sexual satisfaction.”
Not only do men want to see their wives being confident in the bedroom, but they also want to know that they are having fun.
2. Start Things Slowly
Some have the wrong impression that men always want to jump right into intercourse when the truth is, they are just as excited by foreplay as women are.
One way you can take your time with your man is by setting the mood. Put some music on and light some candles. Massage your guy to get him nice and relaxed.
Another great tip is to focus on kissing. Research shows that kissing activates the brain’s reward system. This triggers dopamine and oxytocin and causes couples to feel closer.
3. Do the Work
Marriage courses lay a lot of emphasis on building a thriving sex life and physical intimacy. Taking up any credible marriage course can help you learn how to take steps toward enjoying a healthy sex life with your spouse. A good husband will do a lot for his wife in the bedroom. Women take longer to orgasm than men do. Not to mention, most sex positions have the man in control.
Put together, these things mean that not only is he holding back, but he’s also putting in a tiring workout during physical intimacy.
According to marriage therapists wives can enhance their hubby’s sex lives by choosing positions that put her in control. Not only does this give him a bit of a break, but it also gives him a fantastic view of his wife.
4. Role play His Fantasy
One great way to please your man in bed is to act out his fantasy. Some great ideas that marriage courses endorse for role play duos include:
- Tie him up with restraints, blindfold him, tantalize and tease him as a dominatrix
- Repairman surprise
- Pretend to be a stripper and put on a sexy show for him
- Client and Call girl
- Daring student and college professor
- Naughty nurse and doctor
- Strangers at a bar
- Farmgirl and the Farmhand
- Naughty massage client
- Scandalous voyeur
Those who feel a little nervous about role playing often find they feel much more confident and in-character after dressing for the part.
5. Communicate About Sex
According to marriage therapists, communication is one of the key qualities in a successful marriage. Sexual communication is just as important.
A study of 142 couples, done by the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, found that couples who communicated about physical intimacy had better sex lives.
The research went on to show that an increase in sexual communication increased a female orgasm frequency and boosted relationship and sexual satisfaction in both sexes.
6. Dirty Talk
Men are very visual and verbal creatures in the bedroom. They love to see a show and hear about how turned on you are. This is a great opportunity to use some scandalous dirty talk in the bedroom.
Some people are uncomfortable having dirty talk with their spouse. If you feel hesitant about getting verbal in the bedroom, here are a few points to keep in mind.
You don’t have to be vulgar. Dirty talk is supposed to be fun, not emotionally scarring! If it isn’t your nature to say sexually outrageous things, don’t. Stick to words and phrases that you’re comfortable with. Even something as simple as, “I want you so bad” can be very effective in getting him excited.
Having a glass of wine before getting intimate with your man is a great way to let go of your inhibitions.
Write it out. If you’re not comfortable saying dirty things, you can always write your husband a steamy email or text message.
7. Remember Emotional Intimacy
Studies show that sexual satisfaction predicts heightened emotional intimacy in couples.
Almost all marriage courses underline the importance of emotional intimacy. Emotional intimacy is an important part of the sexual experience. Men have better sex when it is with someone they love, similarly, women are more likely to orgasm with a partner they have feelings for than with a one-night-stand.
Research reveals that one way you can heighten the emotional intimacy in your sex life is by maintaining eye-contact with your partner. According to marriage therapists, not only does this boost intimacy, but it creates an exciting sense of self-awareness that can make sex feel even hotter.
Sex is one of the most intimate and exciting things you can do with your partner. Spoil your man this evening with some real treats. Men love confidence. Boost your sex life by showing him you’re having fun and that his pleasure is your main concern. And remember, don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone.