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Friday, August 14, 2020

10 Reasons Why Some Men Won’t Marry a Single Mum

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Sometimes in our lives, we find people who we expect to love us back as much as we love them, and then we decide to get into a relationship with them, but it doesn’t turn out as we intended.

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Sometimes it is easy to just move on and going to a relationship with someone new but that is not the case for a lot of ladies especially when they have children from the failed relationship. the big question is why do single men avoid going into a relationship with single mothers?

Before we go further, I would like you to understand that being a single mother is not an easy task and women who are bold enough to raise their children single-handedly deserve all the support that they can get.

Bear in mind that getting married to a single mother is not a bad thing, and it takes a man with courage and a heart full of love to undertake such commitment.

Without wasting too much of your time trying to introduce you to what we will be discussing or giving you reasons why it is a good thing to date or marry a single mum, below are ten reasons why men avoid single mothers.

1. Their child or children will already come first

Single Mum

When a man goes into a relationship with a single mother he has to understand that her child would always be her primary concern and his needs will come secondary.

While this does not mean that she doesn’t love the man she’s with, regardless of how understanding the man tries to be, there would be a time he would become jealous that she doesn’t put him first.

2. They are never available

If you plan on going on dates with single mums, bear in mind that it is a risk because there is an 80% chance she would cancel at the last minute.

Something always comes up, it’s either the child needs her attention, or something isn’t just working in their home. So when they have to reschedule you just have to understand.

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3. She will always think the world revolves around her alone

Men at home that single mothers are naturally narcissistic. Men feel that women in this category would want them to drop every other thing and focus on their children and themselves.

When a man sees a woman who exhibits such characteristics immediately assumes that she does not recognise the fact that he has needs, and for that reason, he gets turned off.

4. Single mums are emotionally unavailable

Men believe that most single mothers cannot maintain an intimate connection with them because their feelings are always invested in the child and other people.

While it is understandable that their children would have the bulk of their attention and their emotions, there is also a chance that they may be emotionally attached to the father of their child or children, and for that reason getting genuinely connected with you as the new man in her life would be much of a challenge.

5. The father of her child/children will never leave the picture

When a man goes into a relationship with a single mother he needs to understand that he does not only have to deal with her but with a lot of other people.

The father of a child would always want to pop up and not because he genuinely wants her back, but in a lot of cases, it’s because he doesn’t want to see her happy with someone else.

Even if the baby daddy has moved on with someone else, there is still a chance that he would continue playing games with the mother of his child or children for a very long time and you would be emotionally broken.

6. The kids may begin to plan against you

If you go into a relationship with a single mum who has kids that still love their dad, then there is every possibility they will do everything to get you out of their mother’s life because they want their father back.

You can’t blame the children for wanting their family to be complete so instead of putting yourself in the mix take the closest exit.

7. Her children will hate you for a long time

If you have made up your mind to go into a relationship with a single mum, get ready to deal with her children because they will do everything possible to get you away from their mum because of how much they hate you.

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Regardless of how hard you try to be a nice guy they still will see you as a bad green monster or the wizard that flies with a broomstick wearing a dark garment and a black hat.

8. The entitled attitude

Men assume that single mothers feel because they have children out of wedlock there are entitled to everything that they request for.

Even though she gets all the support necessary from her baby father and from the entire society, she would still expect that you foot the bulk of her bills and also give her all the attention that she wants because she’s a queen who has princes and princesses that must be taken care of.

9. Single mums may have a distorted self-image

Some men assume that single mothers try to see themselves as sexy people because before they had kids, they probably had the best body and skin.

However, they do not understand that when they wear those clothes that reveal their stretch marks and other parts of their body, it just isn’t right.

Even when you are not happy about the way she dresses or tries to act like she’s super sexy when in your eyes she’s not you still have to pretend to see her as a supermodel and sometimes that can be very difficult if your eye naturally honest person.

10. In alot of cases, a single mum will date you to get her baby daddy jealous

You know how it is that you get into a relationship and after your breakup, you go for a rebound relationship either to get your ex off your mind or to get them jealous? Well, single mothers can play that card too.

I must put it out there that I totally do not agree with a lot of these ideas especially because single mothers are still very beautiful people and nobody has the right to treat them like they’re dealing with a condition.

The truth is love can find you anywhere, and you can find love in anyone. So if a single mother is a person who makes you happy, then you have to be brave enough to accept her and her child or children the way they love them regardless and watch how life turns out to be very beautiful for you and your family.

We hope that you enjoyed this piece of writing and we look forward to hearing from you. If you have any suggestions, opinions, or ideas that you would like to share with us, please do not hesitate to use the comment section provided below.

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Disclaimer: This article is purely informative & educational in nature and should not be construed as medical advice. Please use the content only in consultation with an appropriate certified medical or healthcare professional.

Emmanuella Ekokotu
Ekokotu Emmanuella is a sociologist and Anthropologist, writer, and fashion model who lives in Benin city, Edo state,Nigeria.

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